Native American from the Mohican tribe. Writer, Peer Specialist, YouTube Partner.

Posts tagged ‘wellness sanctuary’

My Love Book: ♥ My birthday gift to myself ♥

My Love Book

Sun July 11th or as I would like to say Lucky 7-11 is my birthday. It’s also the new moon and a solar eclipse on that very same day.  One spiritual mother told me that I needed to focus  on love on my birthday to set my intentions. Another said to sit with what brings you joy on the inside, and express this joy in your outer world.. sharing it with others.

My birthday wish is to celebrate love for the entire month of July. Everywhere I go people are wishing me Happy Valentine’s month or ♥Happy Love Month ♥ I wanted something I could engage people with cause I value relationships. So I decided to play DJ Buffy and I began  requesting song requests from people.  I would try to go out and find a video of their song and I would write a dedication to them. I love the interaction that I have been receiving from people as I contemplate and explore love in all of it’s beautiful dimensions.  Self love, romantic love, true love, love of the Creator, etc.

I am a part of a sacred circle of women. In this source of  women’s spirituality I find the security that I have always craved. Within this sacred space I find the acceptance I have always yearned for.  The divine feminine is honored and cherished. The energy that is at the heart of this special circle is most profound,  radiates, and surrounds all those that are there.  I had this desire for women’s spirituality for the longest time. I was on a quest to find where my female spirit could heal and play. I searched various places  within my community where I would feel welcomed as a woman. I talked to random women on the street, on the bus, or anywhere I would encounter them.  I sought out spiritual centers and churches seeking for the right group of women to immerse myself in. A place where my creativity could flourish. A place where I could laugh. Where I could pray. Where my spirit could dance.  After tonight, I think I found confirmation that I found that place… my Moon Circle.

Tonight, I explored my creative side by creating an artbook titled “My Love Book” during the Moon Circle tonight. When I received my name Wabun anung which means Morning Star in a native naming ceremony at 17 years old I instantly envisioned that my path was love. The gifts of life, hope, and light are all given in the act of love as part of the glory of the dawn. My essence is love…my path is to love.  I need to claim my birthright. And being part of this awesome connection with the female heart I am encouraged to focus on that power within me of love and around me.

So, I chose to center my focus on my book with love. This is the first time I ever created a multimedia book. I loved the choices of printed, glitter, marbled, and colored paper. There were a ton of stamps to choose from. Magazines to explore for images. A bowl full of vintage pictures.  Lots of various kinds of ribbons. My inner child jumped for joy. I love having the opportunity of creating. I played with my book as I assembled the images that I wanted to put together. It was absolutely exhilarating having that time to explore with other women.

The following are pages from”My Love Book.” Enjoy.

There is only one happiness in life to love and be loved.

True Love: The trinity between Creator, myself, and the man Creator has picked for me as my true love partner. ♥ July 8, 2010. No. 526715.

Love, Buffy

Each night the moon kisses secretly the lover who counts the stars. ~ Rumi

Happiness is only possible with true love.

Let your teacher be love itself.

Love,

Buffy

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she didn’t just survive~ she became.

That’s what my refrigerator magnet says on my refrigerator. It reminds me that yes I have been through alot of difficult challenges in my life, but it also speaks about my ability to move beyond that and to thrive! Yes THRIVE! I love that word! It contains  such power, magic, and possibility. I really want to connect in this way with myself, get out of my own way, and shine out in the world. Now I feel I am the healthiest I have ever been and I feel great!

When I was at the women’s retail store and wellness sanctuary and taking the Life GPS course I see that the course has helped me be sharper in focus on what I really want in life. I felt the day I started the course 14 weeks ago I was way off course.  The man who runs the Life GPS course is a Life Coach by the name Rick Paddock. He is intensely beautiful and highly sensitive guy. I don’t really trust guys in general. Though I felt I could trust Rick and I talk alot to him. Rick sponsored me for NAMI Walks where I raised $285 in my very first walk.  He took great joy when I explained how well things went with NAMI Walks that it was a great celebration of both my physical and mental health recovery. When I was walking the walk by myself because the group walked much faster ahead than I, I talked to the Creator and expressed gratitude about all the good in my life. I am grateful for all the things that Creator does and doesn’t do. I filmed my walk as I was walking NAMI Walks but the camera was bouncing with every step I take. So I don’t know how I can make it work to get a video on the net with it. I was thinking about using the footage in the park and narrating over talking about some of thoughts and prayers that came to me as I walked the walk. So, Rick is a huge supporter of mine. He leaves me really heartfelt emails and hugs me alot. He listens to me when I talk about my novels, he says I am an empath, and that I am highly sensitive.  He speaks highly of me to Dani the store owner and said he really thinks I am something special and wants to work closer with me. Rick is concerned I don’t always put my needs first and that I give too much to other people because I am a caregiver. He is right about that, I have a hard time telling people what I need. He gets excited when I tell him about my creative dreams and the creative projects I have been working on or developed. During the last session we were talking about the Tree of Life and I latched into wanting to define my Life Purpose which the handout says is the trunk of the tree. I had all kinds of questions about that and he was helping me to clarify that. He said he has a Life Purpose exercise he wants to bring into the course next month. After the last LIFE GPS course he surprised me by asking me to write or make a video testimonial for him for his website. I am so honored he asked me to do that. Which is really great.  I shared my history of being abused by men,  I told him having a positive male relationship helps me to heal my female spirit.

Yes, that is a step I took to become. I also wrote a book titled “Resentments” which I finally expressed all the things and people that I was angry about. Usually, I never really expressed my anger. I just bottled it up and wasn’t even aware that I was angry. I experienced alot of injustices in my life. I wasn’t allowed a sacred space growing up to freely express my emotions. But today I now give myself that gift. I am so grateful that I can let this all go. That I can honor my feelings and now reach towards forgiveness. This book I worked on for over a year and has become a life transforming experience. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders and I was able to clean out the cup and be empty to receive all the love and good in this world in my life. I am open and receptive. I am free.

Love,

Buffy

Moon Circle

“O sisters, let us remember the rhythms of our mother and our mother’s mother; the rhythms of life itself.”  B.Camera – MoonCircle tonight!

I set out to reconnect with the women’s spirituality. The power of the sacred feminine. I wasn’t sure where I was meant to be, but it was no surprise that I discovered the rightful place right under my nose.  It’s at the women’s retail store and wellness sanctuary that I often go to since it first opened. I have been consistently building relationships with the women who go there and it has been an exciting journey indeed. I heard of the Moon Circle, but I had never attended such a group to go. I felt inspired called.

So, I show up and I was pleased to already know half the group and the other half I didn’t know at all. I was caught in the mystery of the night and the new moon. The leader spoke of the power of women’s wisdom handed down the ages and she explained the significance of the moon and her different faces. I have heard about Grandmother moon all through my life, but when she spoke it was like I was introduced to Grandmother moon for the first time and she greeted me as her granddaughter.

We went around and lit our candles. But for some reason I striked the match over and over and I was not successful in lighting a flame. I know I get nervous around fire, perhaps I was afraid to let my light shine. However, that was okay because my sister next to me said “It’s okay just light your candle with my flame.” That made me feel supported, accepted, and loved.

We began to drum and I shooked my rattle and all of a sudden I was inspired to sing. The drum beats surrounded me with the resonance of the rattles shaking and my single lone voice rose. It just made me feel like I was sharing my gift of singing. It was very special. Later the leader said she appreciated that I shared my gift with the circle.

I liked eating this very tasty gourmet popcorn. It’s really good quality stuff with chocolate and such. It hit the right spot. I also enjoyed the pecan sandies. Then I went at writing my intentions for the new moon. I wrote out first for forgiveness. Then I asked to open my heart. Then I wrote about developing my novel which is something that was very important to me. I was so happy to be making these connections with my true intentions. Things are lining up indeed. I am grateful for that. Then I focused my intentions by the Love bridge and released them to the loving arms of the universe. That’s what matters to me the most.

Then I meditated upon my life and I discovered that yes my prayers are being carried to the Creator. I discovered that I have to allow for divine timing to happen. I also need to learn not to sabotage myself that I have the key to let myself out of my own prison. I also needed to realize that I am meant to be accompanied along this journey. Which I am truly grateful for.

Thank you so much Grandmother moon for embracing me as your granddaughter. Thank you for blessing me and for watching out for me. For guiding me. Thank you calling my name for introducing me to my sisters. For helping me to see my own inner light so powerful with my index finger I can charge a penny to stick on a wall for a long time by the power of my dreams.

Love,

Bodacious Buffy

Refrigerator Altar

My Refrigerator Altar

I took a course in HOME ALTARS: Changing Your Consciousness at women retail store and wellness sanctuary. And through the group process I decided to create an altar in my refrigerator on one shelf. The guardian of my refrigerator is Hello Kitty which is fun and playful and forever a part of my life. So I got a pretty basket and filled it with oranges for good luck and then wrapped the basket with a Hawaiian leis. I made a pitcher of grape Koolaid my favorite childhood beverage. A box of Poptarts cause it’s my new found joy. A basket of seedless red grapes which in the Word represents charity. A bowl of cantaloupe represents sun and in appreciation we all dance and partake in the sun’s offerings. ~Buffy

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