Native American Writer & Artist

Posts tagged ‘digital camera’

Raw Fun Big

Greetings fellow travelers,

Today’s suggestion for the day’s Artist’s Date from the Artist’s Date Book was to get new sheets which I set on a journey to find. I walked to a local gas station for hot dogs with ketchup and relish, an orange, and diet Mountain Dew. After, I had lunch I went to the park to pass time til the bus arrived. I looked at the playground and I saw this sign that could spell letters. Most of it was already spelled out and I spelled out raw on the top. So, I decided to make the theme for the day as “Raw Fun Big.” That sounds exciting.

I arrived at Walmart ready to shop for my sheets and get a few items and get out of there, but then I started looking over the whole store for film opportunities. Everywhere I went I was taking film clips. I was very excited about looking at everything for interesting shots to film. I found these deep purple  250 thread count sheets from Better Homes and Gardens.  Finally, as my cart kept getting fuller and fuller I spent a lot of money, but I got alot of needed items and I was happy with that. I struggled carrying 5 bags home on two buses. And I accidentally cut my finger while hauling my goodies home. I had a couple of my newly bought Cherry Pop Tarts when I got home.

When I got home I pulled out my Native American flute and began to record playing the Native American flute after Sonicsuns told me that I should post more videos of me playing the Native American flute.  Sure why not? I will take the suggestion. I mean I have been looking for new suggestions for videos to do. It’s quite fun trying to find interesting and new ways to merge my Native American flute songs with new images. I thought why not merge them with the Walmart footage?

Love,

Buffy

Artist’s Date: Listening to K-Love

Greetings fellow travelers,

Today, I enjoyed the day of indulging in listening to my favorite radio station Positive and Encouraging K- Love as my Artist’s Date which is spending quality time with myself.  What better way to enjoy myself than to take in the richness of the K-Love radio station.  I spent the  day with K-Love on for almost the entire day.  What a great way to spend my vacation day. I found myself really relaxing and I really enjoyed the feeling I have by listening to K-Love.  Serene. Calm. Rejuvenated. Restored. Loved.

I remember the first time I listened to K Love back in June 2009. I just lost my fiance and I was heartbroken because I lost the dream of marriage and children. I was now alone. I was scared about my future and somehow listening to K-Love calmed and soothed my fears. I listened to K-Love all day and all through the night constantly. I couldn’t get enough of it. K-Love was my life preserver which I clung to for dear life.

It was during this time that I discovered my all time favorite song “By Your Side” by Tenth Avenue North. I had suffered throughout my life of feelings of being unloved. In my darkest  moment, I even wrote a poem about how I felt titled “Unlovable.”  When “By Your Side” came on the radio I felt that it was God’s answer to my poem “Unlovable.” The lyric “Why are you searching for love” really resonated with me. I had grow up with various types of abuse and was in foster homes where I was abused even further. I was desperately seeking for someone to love me in my life. K-Love shared with me through the songs on the radio especially “By Your Side” that I don’t need to search for love anymore, that God loves me just as I am.

K-Love also offers a Prayer Request and Encouraging Word of the Day. I have used the Prayer Request online and on the phone several times when I was really struggling and having a very hard time in my life. I cherish having this extra support in my life. There are several times I had questions for God or was going through very difficult times and I was able to find the answers in the Encouraging Word of the Day.

I encourage you to give K-Love a try. Even if you can’t find a local station in your area you can listen to K-Love online. I pray that you are blessed on your journey.

Love,

Buffy

Bubbles!!!

Queen Buffy and her Bubble Wand

My Artist Date was to have a picnic in my private park. I had Mc Donald’s Chicken sandwiches and Shamrock Shake. I was surprised to discover they now come with a cherry. I sat in the sun next to the daffodils and listened to the birds sing. I stared into the wildness of the trees. I then pulled out my camera and took some still pictures and I started to film a video titled “Bubbles.” I have this 80 oz of fruit scented Bubbles and a cool bubble wand. I filmed myself blowing the bubbles until I got light headed. Then I came home and I found a virtual keyboard and recorded myself playing the virtual pan pipes. It was cool they had other sounds to play with too like steel drums. One friend saw my video and asked  if my new name now is Bubbles?  I like that actually because lately people have been describing  me as bubbly. Bubbly Buffy. lol

Super Miracle Bubbles 80 oz of FUN!

Come to the River of Life

Alright today’s Artist’s Date was to walk into a church I never have been into before. Kinda like church shopping. This church kept coming to me in my dreams and I wanted to investigate to see if it had what I was seeking. What is strange about this church is that it doesn’t have a sign so I had no idea what the name of this church was.  In I stepped in and I noticed immediately alot of handouts on some on a spiritual retreat to find your purpose which I collected and was very interested in. Then I saw things for a women’s meetup which I am also very interested in because I am actively seeking women’s spirituality. I didn’t know anybody there, but I liked the banners that were inside the church and I found  them very eye catching especially the one with the banner above.

The words spoken by the Pastor was intriguing me as he spoke about the arc of the covenant and he talked about getting past the veil and being in the presence of God. So much with what he was saying resonated with me and I strongly felt that I needed to be there. During the music I felt answers to my prayers coming to me and I felt God’s presence so strong around me and in me…I cried so hard during the service. I had never experienced such an intense feeling of God’s presence around me before. I had been quietly asking myself am I to stay or leave this place. I felt all of a sudden I needed to be there. There was something there for me.  I didn’t know what that would be. But so many synchronicities kept coming to me and happening. I felt my soul break open and out poured grief and suffering.  I kept hearing Creator say to me you don’t have to carry this burden alone anymore, give it to me give it all to me. All the pain. All the tears. Everything. I saw in my mind’s eye letting the grief of the recent events that had transpire being passed over.  I felt so connected it was unbelievable. I thought by leaving my former church I was going to wander lost and not know where to go and then all of a sudden in this church in a short amount of time I felt like I was in the right place at the right time.

After I watch some baptisms I remembered my baptism with cedar and water that my Native American  foster mother placed over me saying that Jesus would always be with me when I was 16 years old.  I was about to leave this new church when this woman walked past me and I absolutely had to introduce myself to her. I am so glad I did. I hit it off with her instantly and I was feeling such a deep powerful connection. She just opened up to me and revealed some very intimate and  intense things about herself to me, things that I desperately needed to her. And I found I might be able to help her too. Love those win win situations. I asked her to lunch and she agreed and she took me to a Mexican restaurant. We shared our passion for Mexican food and the Spanish language, she told me she loved to do artwork and wanted to do artwork with me.  She said she loved to paint with watercolors in tubes. We had absolutely so much in common, it was if we were always friends.  I had enchiladas and Jarritos Limon soda which she is already reminding me that I need to watch my sugar cause I am diabetic.  She decided to pay for my meal. I was truly grateful. Than I asked where else would she like to go?  I suggested how about a park? She said sure but she wanted to go back to her home briefly.

Enchiladas and Limon Jarritos

I got to see her home. I noticed she loved pink and purple just like I do.  I shared how as  a little girl I loved pink and as I got older I added purple. It was so much fun to share the same favorite colors. She has this most beautiful painting of the ocean by her father painted on her wall with a purple frame.  I noticed these beautiful pink and purple beaded ornaments she had hand made and she said she could share with me how she made it. I also got to meet one of her cats Gideon. I love the story she told me about how her cat appeared at her home from the street and it went away and she said to herself that if she was meant to keep him that he would come back.  And came back he did. She even showed me the scripture about Gideon in the Bible and it was very interesting story. I gained a lot of insight from it when I read it and how it applied to my own life.

We ended up getting back in the car and we went to a local park that had by the Fox river.  I had only been to this park once before and when I had I just broken up with my fiance in June 2009. I had praying to Creator about letting my ex  go and I said a special prayer for a special man and I told the Creator the truth of my heart, but I asked the Creator what Creator’s will was on the situation. Then I have come full circle and I was back at this same place about a  year later. And I have insight of where I am heading and what I am supposed to do for this special man in my life.  I went to the river with my friend and I experienced the immense peace and calm of her presence. I could feel a ton of tension just melting off my left shoulder and I took some video of the river which I later added me playing the Native American flute. I laid down on my back and let the earth absorb my sorrows and grief I looked up the sky and saw the clouds pass by through the branches of the trees and as I laid there with my arms outstretched out I felt something touched the palm of my left hand and I looked over and I saw a clump of seeds that had fallen perfectly and landed in my hand. I felt what a wonderful gift of new life to be planted in my life.

Love,

Buffy

365 Artist’s Dates

My latest video is titled 365 Artist’s Dates…yes I said 365. I have made a conscious decision to take on 365 Artist’s Dates with ideas inspired by the Artist’s Date Book by Julia Cameron which is a companion volume to the Artist’s Way book. My friend from the online Artist’s Way Circle said that she has been reading about my adventures for the past few days and she said that it sounds like I am on a journey of self discovery. She went on to say that it’s good to hear that my photo sessions and the healing that I undertook that day. She also said that it sounds like a shamanic journey. I find that an interesting perspective. I think I am just having a whole lot of fun seeing everything around me with new eyes. It’s inspiring me to write poetry, paint, sing, and dance. My friend who I call Mom says just remember to rest. Such a mom thing to say. lol

Maybe I am on a sort of self discovery. All I know that is when I begin an Artist’s Date I am consciously inviting the Universe to speak to me. I become very receptive to all the sights, sounds, textures, tastes, and touches that I experience as I go on my Artist’s Way journey. I get really excited about each one I have been doing. So far since I made this conscious decision I am on Day 15 and it has been really helpful for me to really have a great experience. I love it and I am very happy.

I am living a great mystery and I am playing the detective looking for clues everywhere where I can. I am listening and reaching out to new people. I am exploring my world with fine tooth comb. I am using all of my senses for directions. For example in today’s Artist’s Date I left my house and determined my direction randomly by the flip of a penny. The first choice was heads go left and tails go right. I got tails and proceeded to go right. I reached a point after I walked and I discovered that I could go forward tails or go left heads  so I flipped again and turned left when I got heads.  This randomness I found myself walking in a street  I never ventured before.  I noticed this large heart ornament on the front of the house down the block and it spoke to me. I feel like my heart compass is being activated and leading me down the corridors which I find very cool. I am happy about that. I am finding out what matters to me the most.

Another friend on Facebook has been reading about what I am doing and she discovered a quote that she posted on my wall which I find humorous.

I am lost and have gone to find myself

If I return before I come back,

please ask me to wait.

Thank You.”

Another friend however had posted that

“Not all who wander are lost.”

Yes I am wandering sort of as I do my Artist’s Dates and they are quality time with myself which is building self love and self discovery. But I am very much guided by every step I am taking. My ultimate Life GPS system is the Creator who can see everything from a tower and I am on the ground in the forest with a phone and I am calling up asking for directions.  And the directions are coming every step of the way. I feel lead and it’s leading me to myself, true love,  and to home. That’s awesome and I am having a great time as I am on my journey.

Love,

Buffy

Artist’s Date: Mission Take Pictures At Park

Greetings fellow travelers,

Today’s adventures led me to my local park on a gorgeous sunny day! I felt awesome. Now I am trying to follow the Artist’s Dates suggestions in the Artist’s Date Book by Julia Cameron but today’s suggestion is to do a headstand and that honestly I am not going to even attempt with all the back problems I have. So, I decided to take my digital camera and take pictures in my local park.

I went excessive and I easily took 245 photos and 4 videos and I just had so much fun experimenting and it was a blast. It was amazing and I was having a very exciting. As I was taking pictures I saw yellow daffodils, walked past ducks sitting in the grass, and I saw three geese fly just over my head as I was focusing my photos. It felt so good to try different things. I never took a photography class before I just winged what I was doing. I tried out different angles of lighting. I was playing around with the features of my camera to figure it out. I had it on the wrong setting but realized some pictures looked kinda interesting set like that. Some warped the view of the pictures of my self portraits but it kinda gave it a circus mirror effect which I find amusing. It also made me considered how distorted my life and self have become as today is the first day of my vacation for a week off of work. The first in like 3 years.  So, yeah I am excited.

I walked along the river and I sat in my favorite spot with tobacco in my hand to talk to the Creator.  I could hear the river talking back at me.  I poured out my heart of all that I have suffered and feared going on in my life. I prayed and asked for help and protection. I asked for healing. I watched the river take away my worries as I cried. I went from extreme jubilation of taking so many pictures in the sun and then winded up going down the river where the sun was setting, I was cold, and I sat in a shadow weeping over the painful things I have been recently going through. It’s been too long to have gone without a vacation. It’s been too long to neglect my innermost needs. I walked over the bridge and let my troubles go.

I decided to go to the store for a deck of playing cards and some batteries. They had buy one get one free so I stocked up on batteries cause I knew I want to take more videos and pictures during my vacation. I feel more energized about doing my blog now that I have a digital camera and I can take original pictures to post. When  I had walked to the store I was greeted with a large metallic sunflower and a dragonfly a huge conformation to me that yes I am on the right path and to trust it.

I decided to take the bus instead of the cab. My regular route wouldn’t come for a long time, but the other route that drops me off a couple of blocks away from my home I decided to ride on that. On came a little old lady in a white and flowerly handkerchief in her hair and a large cart. She sat beside me and began to point out the landmarks of my city and telling me the history behind them. My bus stop came up quickly, but I decided to ride the full route just so I could continue to hear this dear woman’s story. She spoke of many lessons. She used to be a nun for 40 years of the School Sisters of St. Francis of Assisi which was linked to my college Alverno. She told me of the life of a nun.  Sharing the history of her family. She was outpouring her life in the precious amount of time that I had with her. I would share the stories I heard of my great grandmothers and my heritage. She told me about spotting a white owl twice which I found fascinating. The main lesson she told me directly before I needed to get off the bus is that to learn from everything in life.  What a powerful message I needed to hear that. I extended my hand and thanked her and told her my name. She said she loved our visit and then invited me to come by her house. Now this is women’s spirituality in action.

Love,

Buffy

My home has a park

Many past Artist’s Dates I have spent behind my apartment building which is like a  private park.  It’s there I watch bunnies hop and a coyote appeared and looked at me.  I like to take off my shoes and walk on the grass. There’s a white picnic table there and I stare at the trees. Like this tree one among many that I have taken a picture of. I enjoy taking pictures of my special park with my new digital camera. I like this particular picture because I like to look at the lines of the branches, sometimes I see people and faces looking back at me. Sometimes the wind blows and it looks like the branches are waving at me.

Once upon a time when I used to be in a relationship, we would lay on the grass at night and stare at the stars. After I lost that relationship I went there to grieve, as I buried away pieces of my heart with bitter tears.  I also went there  on my knees as tears fell for the death of a great grandmother I never had the chance to meet. I looked up and three rabbits were staring back at me. I cried remembering the last conversation I had with her on the phone. I wanted to know more about where our family came from and she told me stories of our relatives and the history of my people.  I told her Great Grandma Christine I love you.  Later, my Grandfather told me that she told him about the phone call and how I told her I loved her and how happy that made her and how I listened to her stories.  I am so glad that despite the fact I couldn’t get to her physically that I made that one last phone call just before she died because now I carry her stories and love in my heart.  To my private park I went with tears.

My private park is my healing space.  My apartment faces the park in the back and it made me happy to look out of my apartment out to all those gorgeous trees.  My apartment faces east so it’s so beautiful to wake up and watch the pink sunrise and the light rays penetrating the branches. This is the best view in any apartments I have ever lived in. I remember when I first checked out this apartment building I took one look of the trees in the window and I instantly fell in love with the apartment.

One of these days, I am going to take this huge bottle of fruit scented bubbles I bought on a previous  artist date and I am going to blow bubbles which is one of my favorite childhood past times. I would stand on my Gamma’s porch and fill the wand with rainbow iridescent soap and then hold it out over the ledge and I would let the wind rapidly blow a succession of bubbles out. It would make me giggle watching how fast and rapidly these bubbles would fly. I would just do that over and over and I would lose all sense of time.

Love,

Buffy

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