Wenona Gardner – White Turtle Rainbow

Archive for April, 2017

Walker Square Park

I am writing a book for my sister Sassafrass Winter Solstice. A Bloggess Pal suggested I write and post parts of the book here. So here is a poem.
Walker Square Park

By Buffy
It was a sunny day

at Walker Square Park

In Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 

Gamma took Sassafrass and I

there many times.

Gamna got us my favorite

Mexican Watermelon popsicles

with the seeds in them. 

Sassafrass and I were

playing in the sand.

I loved to tease my little sister, but

today she wasn’t having that.

Before I knew it Sassafrass

threw a handful of sand in my mouth.

I could taste all the crunchy granuals and

it was all over my Watermelon popsicle.

Guess next time I will be more careful

what I say around her.

Dear Sassafrass Winter Solstice

I am writing a book for my sister Sassafrass Winter Solstice. A Bloggess Pal suggested I write and post parts of the book here. So this is the opening letter.

Dear Sassafrass,

I am writing this book to thank you for rescuing me from Omaha, NE from a failed relationship by bringing back home to Wisconsin. For allowing me to save my money and providing delicious meals. Thank you for the Ancestry DNA that proves we are really sisters. I am entirely in your debt. There isn’t anything I can do enough to pay you back for your love and generosity. So, I am writing this book for you as a Christmas gift to thank you for your kind and loving spirit.

Love Always,
Buffy
Wenona Lee Gardner

My Introduction

*****Trigger warning abuse****
Hello. I just joined today because my sister recommended Bloggess. I have Bipolar Disorder and PTSD. I was first hospitalized when I was 16 after my father sexually assaulted me and then I was sexually assaulted in the foster home I was placed in by a 26 year old foster brother. Then when I was 23 my boyfriend cheated on me while I thought I was pregnant and he got the girl pregnant at the same time. He then physically assualted me and I miscarried. That’s when I had my first breakdown. I was told by the doctor I had seen too much trauma. Since then I have hospitalized 20 times. 
I hate having a mental illness. My mother has a mental illness and so does my grandmother. I grew up seeing mental illness through them before I was diagnosed. All three of us have been disabled because of our mental illness. I was heartbroken when my mother told me I wasted my time getting my bachelor’s degree from college because I am disabled.  
I am writing my memoir and it sucks that the majority of my life has been about mental illness. There is no way I can tell my story without it. For awhile I tried working on a crisis line but the calls triggered me so I had to stop working. 
I dream of being a writer like Julia Cameron. She has a mental illness to but somehow she managed to write 44 books. I wish I knew how to become a successful writer.
Thanks for listening to me.

Wenona

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